so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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