Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Randomize
