we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Randomize