there was a trapeze. enough said
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Randomize