that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Randomize