When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
Randomize
