Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Last time i carry you out of a forest
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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