I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
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