I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Randomize