I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize
