she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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