she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Randomize
