I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
dear santa what can i do with your candy cane?
does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
Randomize
