We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
It's official drugs can't kill me
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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