I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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