): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
Randomize
