Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize