FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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