very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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