try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
Randomize
