i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
