Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize
