I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.
He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
as a side note pls kill me
Randomize
