some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
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