It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
