i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
my vag is so smooth its legendary
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
