She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Randomize
