i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Randomize
