the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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