we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize