My lawyer watched my DUI video. Said of the thousand or so he's seen, mine was one of the top ten best.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
They are going to name an STD after you.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
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