omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
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