i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
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