She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize
