I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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