forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
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