Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
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