epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
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