Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
Randomize
