Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Randomize
