cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
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