wakey wakey hands off snakey
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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