Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
Randomize
