did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
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