Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Randomize
