That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
