I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize
