I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
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