This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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