You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
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