just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize